When the day went wrong. When we took a rant from the boss, a bin from the boyfriend, an outburst from her friend. When they suppressed our favorite TV series and the pudding in the fridge expired. In these, and many other cases, we just have to … dream. We can go to sleep, lie down between the covers, close our eyes, and ask sleep for a dream. But it does not always end well: after a bad day, it is possible that even dreams are agitated.
And then we just have to dream yes, but with our eyes open.
Because here the direction and the shot, we govern them. Not our unconscious, not others, only us and our desire. And that being said, everything seems beautiful, it seems that we are talking about an action that only involves benefits without risks. But every rose has its thorn, every coin a double face, and every dream an awakening. It is not enough, in fact, that the dream itself is rewarding, what matters most is the return: better that it is beneficial, saving, inspiring, stimulating. Not only breathable.
Here then, in the gallery, risks and benefits of our daydreams. With the comments of Valentina Tollardo , psychologist and psychotherapist, Vice President of the Alice Onlus Association of Milan.
WHY WE DREAM WITH OPEN EYES
We find ourselves there, with our eyes fixed on the void, or perhaps beyond the window, thinking, imagining, dreaming. But why do we do it? “To update our mental and emotional agenda” Valentina Tollardo replies. « To plan the future in the short and long term, to rework some emotions, or to detach from a moment of fatigue and boredom . Daydreaming is a very common activity. “
Daydreams console you, put you in a good mood, lighten you up, relax you, like a film starring you. As a refuge, whatever happens, it is always there. « In some complex and tiring life passages, they also allow us to develop more security and courage : they are the push to face the crisis, they have a recharge function »Says the psychologist.
DREAMS WITH OPEN EYES ARE «THE SATURDAY OF THE VILLAGE»
The beauty of waiting, the construction of expectations. In order not to be broken, we decide to postpone life, prolong the dream. “ The risk is to move away from reality, leaving everything in potential, awaiting perennial ” comments the expert. “If daydreaming becomes a way to hide in a parallel world, it can be a symptom to pay attention to: what are we avoiding? What is blocking us? “.
DREAMS WITH OPEN EYES MAY IMPROVE US
Because they are more satisfying and less tiring than reality , so we decide to stay there. «Reality is more tiring because we are held back by the fears and impediments of life. The dream can instead cradle us in the moment »explains the psychologist. “Of course, achieving your goals in real life is more powerful, but it has less immediate benefits.”
IN DREAMS WITH OPEN EYES YOU LEARN TO KNOW
Because there, free from external influences, you can truly understand who you are and what you want. «During this activity we are in contact with our most intimate aspects, and it is important to pay attention to them: daydreams make us imagine new goals . As for the things of us that we already know, we can rearrange them in creative and unprecedented ways “says the expert.
“IF YOU CAN DREAM IT YOU CAN DO IT”?
Walt Disney's famous phrase becomes a question here. “Let's also add another:” What prevents us from doing it? “. Fear? The criticisms? Difficulties? Daydreams are not a passive film that we are forced to see . If they concern a goal, remember to add a part of planning, to play with “suggests Valentina Tollardo.
AS IT WAS ALREADY TRUE
Sometimes we dream about something so much, we want it so much, that we start behaving as if it were already true. Does this put us on the path to victory, or madness? “If we remain firmly in contact with reality, it becomes a useful exercise: helps us to plan and plan the next steps ” replies the expert. “Be careful therefore of all the times when we suspend ourselves from real life and exaggerate with reveries”.
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